Tuesday, February 22, 2011

A little update

Your comments and emails on my last post were so greatly appreciated.  You have no idea how much it means to me.  It has been a frustrating time the past few weeks, and sometimes I wonder how I managed to deal with things before I started this crazy blog.

I'm going to give you a little update without alot of details.  I try to be cautious of how much I share with you about Mom because she doesn't have the capacity to consent.  It's one thing for me to blab about all my stuff but out of respect for my mother, I do keep a lot of the details surrounding her condition and activities to myself.   I guess because I would hope that if I ever got in that condition I wouldn't want all my daily indignities splashed out to the world.

However, this is what I will share.  We spent most of the morning at the hospital.  We have now confirmed an issue that has the potential to be not good.  However (yes there is always a but) there really isn't anything we can do to fix it.  Because of her advanced Alzheimers  and a few other things, the traditional treatments and remedies that would work on most people are not an option for us.  She would either be non-compliant or some things would create other issues that make it un-manageable.

I am not generally a person that easily accepts there is nothing I can do.  I did get a little fiesty at the hospital but the doctor took the time to sit down with me and we went through ALL the options and the pros and mostly cons of each.  Eventually I had to accept that he was right. 

So I guess we just have to deal with things as they are for now. My grandmother always used to say that you have to play the hand with the cards you are dealt.  So I guess that is what we will do.  It SUCKS but it is what it is.

I had to snap this picture tonight after supper.  The sky was so pretty and soothing, it made me feel a bit better.
Onward and upward.  Thanks again for your concern.  I have the BEST followers!


  1. That sky IS beautiful! :)

    I'm glad you're able to share whatever you can, because it is a large part of your life and who you are. It also helps the rest of us be aware of what it's like, how it could be handled (the alzheimers)... so thank you :)

  2. It is a lovely sunset. I like how pink it is, I like how your grandmother reasoned. I am sure I would have got a bit more than feisty though. :)

  3. Hi Kim,Playing the cards your dealt is a great analogy to Life. It's an easy test if you get easy cards. Those of us that get and unexpected bad hand have learned that a bad set of cards dealt in Life sometimes makes the better player. Plugging through the unexpected extra pain of Life is the true test of our lives. Living and still enjoying Life with a difficult hand is sometimes the hardest thing to do but we must do it.(When I am going through a heart wrenching time I am usually Kicking and screaming Lol) Extra hugs for you! your a strong women and better yet your a caring person. Cheri

  4. Kim,
    You are doing the right thing by sharing only what you are comfortable with and respecting your Mom's privacy. I understand the complicated matters you are dealing with totally. Each day unfolds more things to deal with too. As always my prayers, concerns and hopes are for you and your Mom to be able to get through the difficult days ahead and know that things will be okay!
    Hugs and strength for you dear friend!
    Cathy G

  5. I'm in the position of accepting that there's nothing I can do to help a loved one too. Been there with my mother as well. It's so hard when it's your mom. Oh I do understand, and I do sympathize completely. Best I can offer is to just direct all the unspent energy you would direct toward "doing something" and just use every last ounce of it to love her. All my best to you and your family.

  6. I'm so sorry that you and your Mother have to go through this hard time. I remember when my Uncle had Alzheimers and my Aunt was taking care of him alone. We had no idea of all the things she had dealt with until later after he passed...you are a hero to your Mom and I will keep you both in my prayers. Hopefully that beautiful sky you photographed will in indeed comfort you.

  7. Hang in there Kim. My best friend, a cancer survivor always says that God never gives you more than you can handle.

    Take care,

  8. That is a gorgeous sky.
    I know how tough things can get and we when in these circumstances are tougher than we realize.
    I know you will continue to do your best to care for your mother. I'm sure if she could express it she would be telling you how much she loves and appreciates you.
    Hugs to you both

  9. Kim, How I admire your bravery! It is so great that you respect your mom's privacy. Please share with us what you feel you can so that our prayers are constructive and can help you get thru your days. We all love you and your blog and are touched by your devotion to your mom and aunt. Love to all of you.

  10. Haven't checked on my bloggers for a few days now..drove "NUTS" with trying to design a new rug..not sure if I will show it when finished..
    So sorry, Kim, to hear of your Mom's condition..Do the best you can...that is all that is expected of you..Prayers and good vibes go your way.
    I do LOVE the rug you are doing...I can feel those beautiful yarns you are using in it...

  11. Dear Kim, your love for your mother is so unconditional that it touches me deeply. I understand abou you wanting to do all you can to protect your mom from the indignities that Alzheimer can bring on and respect you even more for that.

    You are to be admired for your devotion and the caring that you give to your dear mother. I'm so sorry that things are getting more complicated with your mom's condition. There will come a time that you will no longer be able to care for her and I know that you are doing your absolute best under the circumstances.

    I love the pink sky. Big hugs dear friend. Julia

  12. Kim ~
    How wonderful that you can still see the beauty in spite of all you are dealing with. My heart aches for you and your Mom. Remember we are always here for you, ready to send our prayers and good thoughts your way.
    You are such a wonderful daughter and I will say it again ~ there will be a special place in heaven for you.
    Hugs :)

  13. Kim...your grandmother was right but it is so difficult sometimes...I know! I try not to talk about my dad and his issues and it is hard sometimes not to just let go and vent. It is what it is and you are doing all in your power to provide the best life for your mother! Actually MUCH more than some would do. Hang in there and I am thinking about you.

  14. That must be so very hard for you to deal with.
    That picture is beautiful and that means you are looking up! Which is good. just don't forget to take care of yourself too.


  15. Kim I thought alot of you before but your statement about your choice to not write about your Mom's issues because she can't consent and also just because of your kindness, love and consideration with respect to that issue makes me just very proud to know you. Such love and respect from a daughter. Thinking of you Kim, and that is one beautiful pink cotton candy sky!

  16. Dear Kim, please know that your blogging friends are here to listen and support you. I respect your decision to keep your Mom's difficulties private. I too am a person who feels the need to 'do something' even when told there is nothing I can do. It's hard to accept not having the power to make it better.
    My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your Mom.
    The phpto of the sky is lovely. Take all the soothing moments you can find!

  17. Kim,
    Please feel free to e-mail me anytime you need someone to talk to:

  18. Dear Kim,
    My heart aches for you and your mom as you travel this difficult road. You are caring for her with enormous strength and dignity. Those qualities are washing over her as well. I've been keeping both of you in my prayers. Given all the lovely comments, I believe that we are a group that only wants to support you fully, and the sharing of the details isn't necessary. Believe in your strength and remember that you are not alone.

  19. Kim - I'm sorry - you and your mom are in my prayers. As a social worker, I go through this with alot of families but it isn't easy for anyone. My father-in-law has symptoms of early Alzheimer's and I'm trying to prepare my husband's family for what is ahead. So, I'm always thinking of what you as a caretaker are dealing with also.

  20. I am so sorry for all that is in your hands, You are dealing with it with laughter and grace. many blessings to you my blog friend. May you find the comfort you need.

  21. Kim I am so sad to read these post about what you and your mom are going through. I wish I knew how make things better for you.
    I am glad your posting about it because we do love and care about you and sometimes it just helps to put it in writing.
    You are a sweetheart and I wish I could give you a real hug tonight but instead here is a big cyber hug.
    Love ya